Doesn’t this cover just beg you to pick up the book? If you’ve been reading PBB for any length of time, you know I love a meaty interview. Today, my friend Penny Parker Klostermann has given us a GEM — especially for those who love to write in rhyme.
I often talk about the book before diving into the interview, but in this case, I’ve included in my questions the many things I admire about Merry Christmas, Dear Mars, and Penny has elaborated so beautifully that I’m going to get out of the way and bring her front and center, pronto.
Jill: Welcome, Penny! Glad to have you back. Have you always wanted to use The Night Before Christmas structure? Why Mars?
Penny: I love The Night Before Christmas and even though I knew that there were many, many retellings of the poem out there, I wanted to tackle it. During Tara Lazar’s 2011 Picture Book Idea Month which was in November back then (PiBoIdMo, now Storystorm), I’d written down three or four ideas to explore and one of those was an outer space setting. The next month Susanna Leonard Hill announced the rules for her 2011 Holiday Contest — “Post your own version of Clement C. Moore’s traditional poem ‘Twas The Night Before Christmas.” Timely, right? I experimented with one or two other ideas but was drawn to the outer space setting. I could imagine cute little aliens wishing Santa would visit them.
Jill: Whew, 13 years from idea to publication. Sounds familiar. That’s a great timeline to share at schools/libraries … “Kids, this story was born before you were.”
Penny: When I started drafting, outer space seemed like an awfully big setting, so I narrowed it down to Mars. And, honestly, I tend to be a pantser so the Mars/stars rhyme was appealing. The more I worked, the happier I was with this decision. In the original, Santa visits one home but when I read that poem, the coziness, festivity and spirit of Christmas translates to my home. I felt visiting one planet would bring that same feeling. And isn’t the red planet perfect for Christmas?
Jill: Smart! Let’s talk about rhyming. Penny, I wasn’t surprised that the text was smooth and FUN to read. You’re one of my favorite rhymers, because your text can’t be “read wrong.” Did the words flow easily, or did the story take lots of time to wrestle into shape?
Penny: First of all, reading that I’m one of your favorite rhymers made my day! I drooled over your rhyming books before I started on my own journey to publication. I’m seriously wondering if I should cross stitch that quote and hang it above my fireplace!
Jill: You crack me up!
Penny: For me, getting a rhyming manuscript ready for submission always involves wrestling! I believe when we hear that a lot of editors don’t want to see rhyme, it’s because writers skip the wrestling. So, while the first draft flowed somewhat easily, in order to get the meter just right, there were a lot of filler-ish words. I know that every word counts in a picture book manuscript and knew I’d have to wrestle to replace filler-ish words with strong story-related words. I use word banks for all my manuscripts. For this story, I had a huge word bank that included vocabulary for outer space, Mars, Martians, Christmas, Santa, reindeer, sleigh, mechanics and more. I pasted the word bank at the bottom of my manuscript so I could easily draw from it to replace filler-ish words and wrestle my story into shape.
Jill: I hear ya! Those filler-ish words are stinkers. Great for a draft, but yeah, we eventually have to pump up the specificity. A word bank is a brilliant way to do that. So, what gave you the most trouble in getting this STORY exactly right?
Penny: The first version of the manuscript went to a lot of editors. It got quite a bit of interest, even two revise-and-resubmits, but no offers. I started wondering about the fact that it grabbed attention, but after consideration, editors passed. So, I took advantage of an online opportunity (through SCBWI) to get a critique from an editor. Her critique was excellent. I took several of her comments to heart, especially her comment pointing out that the main character and Santa both needed to be involved in the rescue. The rescue team upgraded the sleigh and reindeer while the main character and Santa essentially disappeared during that part of the story. Once I addressed that, I knew the story was exactly right.
Jill: There’s a super-whimsical feel here, and each spread delivers delight. You must have had a blast coming up with lines like (on the sleigh upgrade spread, below): “A gingerbread gizmo whirred up to restore/the jingle bell boost to the main power core. The mistletoe module was transformed to channel/a positive charge to the sugarplum panel.” Holy moly, Penny. These lines are gold!
Penny: Thank you! I had such fun coming up with these lines and I love that “whimsical” came through. My word bank was super handy. On top of my word bank, I had several images of Santa’s sleigh to look at as I worked. Mixing Christmas whimsy with my imagined mechanical workings of a sleigh took a bit of doing. I was going for the right balance of Christmas and mechanics. I’m not a sleigh mechanic, of course, but I did have fantasy on my side. LOL
Jill: Ha! Yeah, writing about anything mechanical would give me fits. Let’s talk about the art by Estrela Lorenzo. You must’ve been floored when you got a look at this. She included SO many fun (and funny) details into the art that aren’t mentioned in the text. What’s your favorite or most unexpected find?
Penny: There’s NO end to my favorites and unexpected finds. Every spread is filled with both. I’ll name a few and then tell you about BIG favorites that resulted from the unexpected when I got a look at Estrela’s art.
Favorites:
-Narrator’s childlike drawings that emphasize how Mars dreams of a visit from Santa.
-The Martian gingerbread cookies.
-I mention the “merry ol’ moon” early in the story. I’d wondered about how Estrela would handle the fact that Mars has a second moon. Perfectly! That’s how she handled it. The second moon is included but the “merry ol’ moon” shines as a character in the art as the story progresses!
Jill: Illustrators can add such MAGIC to a tale.
Penny: Now the BIG favorites that resulted from the unexpected when I got a look at Estrela’s art. We always hear that a picture book is two visions coming together — a marriage of text and art. I think what happened with Merry Christmas, Dear Mars will demonstrate just how magical a marriage of two visions can be.
First, when I saw the art, the main character (narrator) I envisioned wasn’t anywhere to be seen! That, in turn, eliminated some other characters I’d envisioned to be replaced by a new character!
Here’s what went down. As with all retellings, I needed a twist and my twist was Santa going to Mars. But for another small twist, I decided I’d have a different narrator than the original poem:
And Papa and I in our doze-n-dream caps/had just wired in for our Christmas Eve naps.
My vision was for Mama to be the narrator instead of Papa. But, no Mama narrator! Estrela had drawn a little Martian kid as the narrator. I had not one second of hesitation about going with her vision instead of mine. I knew Estrela had nailed it. I loved her vision and had a major why-in-the-world-didn’t-I-think-of-that moment. I believe my vision was stuck back in the original with an adult looking on. Thank goodness I didn’t have an art note!!
Jill: I LOVE it when that happens!
On top of that, these lines were in the manuscript I submitted.
The wee ones were snoozing in snug cruiser beds/the tinkling of jingle bells filling their heads.
Uh-oh! I imagined the “wee ones” as Martian kids but the narrator is a Martian kid so that eliminated my vision of the “wee ones.” Here’s where Estrela introduced a new character. She drew an absolutely adorable Mars pet snoozing in the cruiser bed. Again, not a second’s hesitation about Estrela’s vision instead of mine.
At this point, the art director asked me if I meant for the “wee ones” to be pets and, if so, should another pet be added in art, or should we keep one pet and change it from “wee ones”to “wee one?” I explained how my vision had differed from Estrela’s but that, hands down, I wanted to go with her vision. Not only was the pet adorable, but I fell in love with the pet’s energetic interaction with the narrator throughout the story. I knew adding more pets would mess with this special connection. As I reworked the lines to fit the meter, I realized naming the pet would add a nice personal touch. I needed a two-syllable name, and I found the perfect name in my word bank. Figgy as in figgy pudding. Now those two lines read like this.
Figgy was snug in her orbiter bed,/the tinkle of jingle bells filling her head.
[Jill: Speaking for all rhymers when I say THANK YOU for this nuts and bolts peek behind the evolution of a specific couplet. I love this kind of stuff, and it’s exactly what we have to do to get from draft to viable (and irresistible) manuscript.]
Penny: The Martian kid narrator and Figgy were unexpected because of how I’d envisioned the story. But both are BIG, HUGE favorites!
The magical marriage of text and art is evident in the entire book, but I felt sharing what led to changes in my vision demonstrates the need to be open to collaboration. While my vision sold the manuscript, Estrela’s vision of the Mars world completed the story in the very best way.
Jill: You have wrapped this up in exactly the right way, Penny. 🙂 I couldn’t have said it any better.
Attention, readers! Leave a comment below for your chance to win a copy of Merry Christmas, Dear Mars! of your very own. U.S. mailing addresses only, please.
You had me at a rhyming Christmas story set in space, but add in whimsical words and pictures, a dog named Figgy and a Martian kid narrator, and I’m certain this will become a favorite book in my Pre-K class! I loved reading about Penny’s use of word banks and how the story evolved with the addition of the illustrations!
I love that you’re sharing this with your Pre-K class! I taught school for 26 years and witnessing the students love of picture books inspired me to pursue publication. I hope that your class enjoys Merry Christmas, Dear Mars!
Great interview, you two!
Thanks, Jody!
What a fantastic interview! This feels like a master class in writing in rhyme from two rhyming masters!! I can’t wait to get my hands on MERRY CHRISTMAS, DEAR MARS. Congratulations to both Penny and Estrela!!
Thanks, Judy. I’m glad that you enjoyed the parts about writing in rhyme. It’s a process but totally worth it in the end.
Congratulations Penny! Can’t wait for this one to add to my collection.
Thanks, Rosemary. I hope you’ll enjoy it.
Wow! What an interview and what a book! I can’t wait to read it. Congrats Penny and Estrela and thank you Jill!
Thanks, Debra. I adore your books!
No need to add my name for the drawing – Merry Christmas, Dear Mars will be on my staff shelf for my Kids Pick next month at the bookstore!!
Hooray! Thanks, friend!
oh this is just such fun…thanks for sharing!
Thanks, Katie. The entire process with the team at Godwin Books was filled with fun moments!
Love, love, love! Who knew Penny was a master cross-stitcher as well as rhymer?
Don’t enter me in the draw – my copy is already on order. Congratulations!!!
Hahaha! You can mark master cross-stitcher off of my list of talents and add master-google-searcher-for-cross-stitch generator! Thanks for ordering Merry Christmas, Dear Mars.
I loved reading about how this book came to be! Thanks for sharing your process with us, Penny, and thanks for the fantastic interview, Jill. The illustrations are delightful, and the rhyme is spot on!
Thanks, Becky. I love hearing about and talking about process. It’s fascinating to me!
I can’t wait to read this book–it sounds like so much fun! Thanks for an amazing interview!
Thanks, Linda. I hope you get to read it soon!
this was a fun read–and peak into your process.
Thank you, Sallye. I love hearing about process. It’s always interesting and there are tidbits to take away and possibly apply to my writing.
Oh, this looks like a blast! Mars is adorable! Congratulations!! Thanks for the great interview!
Thanks, Angie! Blast is a great way to describe it!
This looks amazing! What a great interview. Congratulations, Penny!
Thanks, Lynn. I’m glad you enjoyed the interview.
What a clever idea! And it’s wonderful that the illustrator made the MC a child. I’m always looking for a new slant on a Christmas story. Thanks for sharing.
Estrela Lourenço’s art couldn’t be more perfect. I so love everything she added to the Mars world. I love new slants on Christmas stories, too, and I’m happy I have one out in the world.
What a fun story! Congratulations, Penny! I’ve got it on hold at my library and can’t wait to read it!
Thanks, Kim. And hooray for having it on hold at your library. That’s music to my ears!
I agree about Penny’s rhyming! So smart and clever!! It’s so much fun to hear how an illustrator added to the layered text. Double smart! Congratulations on the 13-year journey!
Thanks, Wendy. I began to wonder if it was ever going to catch an editor’s eye and then it landed with the perfect team!
What a fun story! I love the humor, rhyme, and the charming illustrations!
Congratulations!
Thanks, Mark. Estrela Lourenço is unbelievably talented. She nailed it and I’m thrilled!
What a fun book – kids (and their parents) are going to love this.
Creating a word bank to work with is a brilliant idea!
Thanks, Claire. I started using word banks early in my writing journey. I even did it for my upcoming PB bio so that I could make sure my verbs were the strongest they could be. For me, it’s an essential tool.
I checked this book out from my library last week and was SO impressed with the cute story and well written rhyme! Way to go, Penny! Thanks for sharing the story’s journey with us!
Hi Bri! I’m glad you liked the book and I’m so happy your library has it. I hope your writing is going well.
Great interview – and a fun book!
Thanks, Robin. Glad you enjoyed the interview and the book!
Thanks so much for sharing this fun interview! I love your illumination of the inspiration, collaboration, and machinations behind this book! I also appreciate your word bank process tip — banks a lot! 🤗
Congrats on this great partnership of words and pictures!👏👏
Banks a lot! Ha! That’s a good one. Yes, using a word bank is super helpful. I hope you find it useful.
This interview is one of my favorites so far. I enjoyed reading about using a word bank to eliminate those filler words and make the story more specific. This book will be a classic someday and always fun to read. Thank for for sharing your book’s journey from idea to publication and how the illustrator made this idea even stronger.
I hope you’re right, Danielle … how I’d love for it to be a classic! I’m glad you enjoyed the interview. Word banks are amazing! Estrela Lourenço did such a great job of creating the perfect Christmassy Mars world.
Update–I checked your book out from my library and absolutely adored it! The flow of text is a work of art. I will be posting my review and it will be glowing!
Thanks, Danielle. I really appreciate that your posting a review!
Jill and Penny, what a fantastic interview! Thank you. I loved learning how the book came to be, the twists and turns along the way. Congratulations Penny!!!
Thanks, Vijaya. I’m with you — reading about a book’s journey is one of my favorite things. I always learn something about writing and/or publishing.
This interview was like a master class in rhyming, perseverance, and letting go of preconceived ideas! Thank you both, and congratulations, Penny.
Thanks, Rose. I mainly tried my best to keep working on the next thing, but I have to admit that I reminded myself of perseverance every few months!
What a great interview and a lovely book. I enjoyed the sample pages immensely. The rhymes are so fun. Congratulations!
Thanks, Claire. I’m glad you enjoyed the interview and peek at the book!
Wonderful interview! I loved reading about how this book came to fruition. I can’t wait to read it! What a fun premise…Christmas on Mars! Congrats, Penny!
Thanks, Judy. I’m glad you like the premise. I had a lot of fun imagining Santa visiting a new planet!
I have the original poem memorized and used to teach it to my 4th grade students in time to present to parents before the holiday break. Now I wish I was still teaching and could share your book with them. Congratulations on such a delightful picture book!
Thanks, Kathy. I love the original. it’s just part of the season for me. I was a teacher, too. I love that your 4th graders presented the poem for their parents. That will always be a fond memory for the students and the parents.
Penny! I’m SO excited to read this! YAY FOR RHYME! Congrats!
Thanks, Rebecca! YAY FOR RHYME is right! I sure do admire your gift for writing in rhyme.
It looks like you’ve outdone yourself with this one, Penny. What fun! Thanks for sharing your journey with this one making it into the world. You go! Congratulations! I can’t wait to get my hands on it.
Thanks, Alayne. I really love how the book turned out. It was worth the long journey.
What a great interview! This book looks adorable! I love all things Christmas–especially Christmas picture books! I can’t wait to add this to my collection! Thank you for sharing your process because I don’t write in rhyme and anyone who can amazes me! Congratulations, Penny, I’m so happy for you!
Thanks, Daniele. I love all things Christmas, too. The festivity makes me happy. It’s fun to walk around stores and see all the sparkles and evergreen. Christmas picture books add such a fun element.
So many great rhymes! This one’s a new classic, for sure. Congrats, Penny. Lots of work involved, but so woth it!
Thank you, Marty. Yes, lots of work is worth it when the book is finished and adorable!
Oh, Penny, this book sounds wonderfully fun! Love all the rhymes! Great interview you two!
Thanks, Tina. It took a lot of experimenting to find the best rhymes for some of the lines but there was also a celebration with each one I found!
I’m so impressed that Penny had success with a story that’s 1) about Christmas, and 2) written in verse. Editors often mention how hard it is to break into those categories. MERRY CHRISTMAS, DEAR MARS must be terrific! (And now I want Martian gingerbread cookies.)
The Martian gingerbread men are one of my favorite details! Thanks for reading the interview, Janet.
My goddaughter would love this book.
I was able to read this at an event this weekend and was happy that the kids responded well. Thanks for reading about my journey, Loreli.
What a creative idea- A “night before Christmas story” on Mars! Why didn’t I think of that? Oh yeah, I cannot rhyme to save my life. Congrats on a wonderful idea and book!
Thank you, Mary. The Mars setting turned out better than I imagined. Estrela’s art added so much fun!
I love that you were able to bring this fun story through the waiting, revisioning gauntlet-magic for holiday readers! Thanks for sharing the process!
Thanks, Stephanie. The waiting was definitely worth it!